My husband and I have been together for 5 years and married for two years. Before I became pregnant, our relationship was great. We hardly every fought and we were best friends. Tim works in finance, and I am a welder. I am also four months pregnant.
After I had found out I was pregnant, my husband did a complete 180. We weren’t planning on having a baby until we were both at least 30, but we also weren’t as careful with using condoms as we could have been. Suddenly, he couldn’t trust me anymore, and he suspected that I was cheating on him. He never went so far as to ask for a paternity test or outright accuse me of cheating, but it was always heavily implied.
Tim seemed to have mostly gotten over his insecurities about the pregnancy, but now he’s saying that I should stay at home and take care of the baby instead of going back to work. I’ve explained to him over and over again that I will not give up my career. Tim is trying to rationalize his demand by saying that daycare will be expensive, but when I suggest that he quit his job to take care of the baby, he says it isn’t a realistic option. This is bs because I earn $29/hour plus overtime and Tim earns $24/ hour. When I asked him about the real reason why he doesn’t want me to return to work, Tim admitted that he was concerned about my male coworkers and that he was worried I might be using my job to cheat on him! It didn’t have anything to do with my job safety and everything to do with him thinking I am cheating.
At this point, I am so fed up with Tim and his attitude towards me that I am willing to call his bluff. Tim says that if I go back to work, that he is going to leave because he trusts me. I want to tell him that if he makes the demand again, to make the demand using a stack of divorce papers instead of words. I love my husband, but the way he’s treating me has me so angry and hurt that I’m not sure I want to put up with him and his attitude any longer. I would still be keeping the baby, but being single mom sounds nicer than living with a man who accuses me of cheating on him.
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